For all of you who follow sports (to any degree), specifically football, I am sure you have heard about the recent anti-gay comments made by the 49ers Chris Culliver. If you have not, here's the link to one of the many articles being written: 49ers' Chris Culliver: Openly gay player not welcome
It sounds to me like this guy is deep in the closet and needs to learn to speak English. I am ashamed to say that I used to say similar things when I was in the closet and so do many other gay men who have not or cannot accept this part of themselves. I am not meaning to sound like one of those gay guys who thinks anyone who is homophobic is automatically gay but, I just don't understand why else he would have so much hate towards gay men. Unless he was possibly abused by a man, not necessarily a gay man, as a child. That could at least be an explanation for his hate and discrimination (yes I watch Law & Order SVU). What does everyone here think of his comments and the reasoning behind them?
As the article reads, it is crazy to me that the 49ers were the first NFL team to join the "It Gets Better" campaign just six months ago and now one of their players is spreading this kind of hate. It's also clear, in my opinion, that his apology was solely for business purposes. He found himself in the hot seat and I'm sure the pressure being put on him to do so was enormous.
The 49ers will play the Ravens this Sunday in the Super Bowl. Brandon Ayanbadejo, linebacker for the Ravens is a very different man from Chris Culliver. It turns out he is one of our greatest allies and here is an awesome article written about how he grew up and became so accepting of everyone's differences: Standing Up at an Early Age this guy sounds like a true champ.
Also, here's another article about former college football captain Brian Sims: Outsports.com. I read this one a while back and looked the dude up, he's a real stand up guy who is doing a lot for LGBT people. Plus he's pretty hot....
Alright I know that's a lot of reading to do haha but I think it will all be worth your time, it goes beyond sports, showing us how great people can be. I also think football should be played naked, and here is my reasoning:
A buddy of mine sent me this video a while back and I meant to throw it in a blog post but forgot. It is called the LifeCycle video put out by the Holstee Manifesto.
"The LifeCycle Film came about as a desire to bring the energy and passion behind the Manifesto to life through something we love--biking. As we seek to live mindful lifestyles that leave a positive impact on the people and world around us, biking has become a passion that is much more than a transportation alternative. It is a way of fully experiencing the city we love and all of its details.
This Film is a celebration. It is a celebration of gatherings, of diversity, of life, and of the beauty of shared experience. We hope you enjoy."
-Holstee
I really dig the last line: "Life is short. Live your dream and share your passion." Too often we are all closed off from each other, always hesitating to share with one another what our dreams and/or passions are in fear of being judged. We live in a society that promotes individuality but will judge unfairly when one expresses who they are. I am guilty of this. I grew up in an especially tight-knit and segregated part of the country, in the heart of New England. I haven't been exposed to a lot of diversity in my life. Here in [insert name of Small Town], MA USA, we tout how diverse we think our area has become. But really, its hardly changed. We only promote diversity if you're white, speak proper English, come from a good family, attend church, go to a good school, etc. You get the drift.
At this point in my life I want to break away from this town, my extended family, and what few friends I have left here. There is this expectation that we all grow up here, go away to school, marry, and come back to live and raise our families here for generations. No-fucking-way dudes. Not happening. I need my space, I need to live my life the way I want to with out my extended family being on back 24/7. A lot of my cousins are already moving away so they can be who they are/want to be without being criticized. Hopefully I will soon be doing the same.
Dream: To create a life for myself that defines the man I am becoming.
2013
- This spring I will be starting my career in real estate.
- To live in Boston, this one could happen today, tomorrow, next week, next month, whenever....it's a matter of me having the balls to make the jump.
- Start taking classes in College as I am unsure of whether or not I want to enroll as a part-time or full-time student.
- Make more friends. I think I'm outgrowing some of my friends and really want to get out there and meet people who are more like-minded.
- Fuck around with another dude. Really wanna meet other gay guys that I'm attracted to and just make friends and screw around a bit. Never had any experience with a dude, this is the year.
- I am also thinking of starting a small line of ties that will be made in the USA and will hopefully start selling them through my long time tailor in Cambridge, MA.
Future
- Dating, boyfriends, marriage, kids. I had a vision the other day. It was of me after coming home from work, sitting in the kitchen with a kid in my lap and three others around the table, and my husband standing there across from me next to one of the counters. It was brief but it felt so right, so peaceful and happy. I couldn't see his face, just his demeanor. I had a great feeling for the few seconds it lasted and hope it was some kind of foreshadowing.
- More than anything I want a marriage like the one my parents had. I am not joking when I say I have never seen a couple have so much respect, love, kindness, and loyalty to one another than my parents. They were best friends and created an awesome life together, my hope is to follow in their footsteps.
Passion: Living how I want to live.
- I can't believe how different my life is from one year ago. I am at a crossroads right now and it is exciting, nerve-racking, confusing, and everything in between. The most important thing is that I am in a good place. I am finding myself and I am going to hit rough patches but I am strong enough to overcome them now. I can finally say I am at a point where I can start forging my own way in life.
So dudes, what is your dream? your passion? You can share or not, but write it down! Goals, dreams (whatever you want to call them), are more powerful when you put them into writing.
Hope everyone's had a great start to 2013
P.S. I just want to say how super-fucking-pumped I am that the Bruins are playing again!! The NHL lockout went on waaayy too long and I'm glad the B's are back and won their first two games!
P.P.S. Ray Lewis, go fuck yourself, you're a bitch. Sorry Ravens fans but, he is what he is (and we all know what that is). All that bs drama after the win on Sunday's game against the Pats was for pure show. Truth. (excuse the negativity)
Happy New Year! I wanted to post (even at this late, or should I say early, hour) to let all of my readers know how grateful I am for the support and kind words during all that I have been through over the past year. It wasn't an easy one and my family and I are happy to leave it behind. This year is going to be a very different year, in all good ways. I wish all of you a peaceful, happy, and healthy 2013.
Using snow banks in the backyard to chill the champagne bottles.
For me, 2013 is the year goals are reached and dreams are realized.
